If you don't read this entire thing, just read the last 2 lines!

It's been a long time. I'd like to pretend like I've been uber busy and preoccupied; you know, say that's why I've been gone, but that would be a lie. I haven't been doing anything. Just sitting around, napping, playing with Baby S, munching on junk, and moping...

Blah Blah Blah

Sorry that I haven't been updating as regularly as I'd like. I've felt so busy the last few weeks that I was kind of taking a break from everything {including cleaning my house} ha! Today was a "let's get back to business" day.

Excuses, Excuses

First off, Happy Hump Day Y'all!

  I've been pretty down lately. I haven't been making the greatest decisions. I've been lazy. I've been making a lot of excuses...

It has never been easy {even when I've been in shape, healthy, skinny} for me to be active or eat healthy when the I'm on my period. {Side not to all the guys: Sorry dudes, this is totally a girly girl's blog and we're all grown-ups here. Girls have periods. Surprise!} I have the worst PMS. It just knocks me off my butt! Seriously. Major fatigue, back ache, headaches, cramps, extreme moodiness, CRAVINGS, and increased hunger. I like to crawl in bed and sleep the week away {but that is completely unrealistic, especially with a baby}. The CRAZY comes out and I pretty much say "bye bye" to healthy choices. Chocolate? DID YOU SAY CHOCOLATE!? Yes, please! Greasy mexican food? Count me in! Dessert every night? Sign me up!

It happens e.v.e.r.y t.i.m.e!

   

Sorry I've been slacking with my posts this week! Who has two thumbs and has been super sick? 

I'm fairly positive that I don't have the flu, but I've got whatever comes right under that. Yes, that is a self-diagnosis. No, I haven't gone to the Dr. No, I don't have any plans on going. Today is the first day that getting out of bed has been halfway doable. Maybe it's because I actually have to get out of bed today to take care of my child!? HA! Mommy problems! 

{Side note: Huge THANK YOU to my dear mother in law who is always willing to take Baby S for the day to help me out in any way. And she does so HAPPILY. #Blessed}

Anyway,

A little life lesson from Megan on "Bridemaids"...

I'm baaaaaack!

My poor little Baby S ended up having a tooth pop up! We believed he had been teething for, like, 2 months {with all the chewing, biting and drooling going on}. So glad he finally cut that tooth. It took forever. Whoever says babies don't get fevers when they teeth are just plain silly. Every tooth he has had he has been super fussy, acting sickly, and has at least a low-grade fever. This time, it was a little worse.

Bettering myself in every way possible

  Not only am I working towards my weight loss goal, but also bettering my overall person. Mind, body and spirit. What does that mean, really? Well for me, when I'm overweight and unhealthy, I'm not the best "me" I can be. I'm more hateful, more withdrawn, lazy, anti-social, unmotivated, depressed and less focused. I'm so unhappy with myself that I tend to be angry/bitter/rude with people that are in a good place in their life or happy. How incredibly selfish and horrible of me?! Well, with the bad comes the good; realization, ownership, apology, repentance, and regret. Since I have recognized this awful behavior, I'm setting out to right my wrongs. 

I feel like I'm in a 12 step program or something! Hi, I'm Lauren and I'm a food addict...

Today I called someone that I didn't show much love or compassion to, when they were in a time of need, because I was so unhappy with my own burdens that I couldn't be "bothered" with other people's problems. *Le Sigh*  I apologized and told them how I'm trying to do better, be better. Luckily for me, we're family and I was forgiven.

Not only have I wronged those I love most, but I've been a horrible example to those that don't even know me. My faith in God and being a Christian is my top priority in life. If I'm too "busy" being negative, depressed, uncaring and hateful, how am I being a light to the world? I'm not! Who would ever be brought to Christ looking at my attitude?  I'm suppose to be set apart from the world and be a light in this dark, dark world. The world tells us "it's my body and I can do what I want" but my body is the LORD's temple. I'm suppose to take care of it! But I digress...

Being healthy in mind, body and spirit is so important to me. It's not just about the weight loss... It's also about being the most loving wife, the best mom, the best friend, the compassionate sister, the helpful daughter, the most "Christ-like" Christian woman that I can be. Being mentally stable. Being emotionally available. Being physically capable. It's all a package deal.

How does being over-weight affect you? Are you held back physically? Are you sure that is all? Is there more to the discomforts of being overweight than you think? If you've never been at your goal weight or if you've never been healthy... You may not know the real you. There could be something or someone bigger than you {not physically..} inside of you that is waiting to be revealed to the world. 

I want to leave you with this challenge...

Name 5 positive things about yourself: *****

1. I'm funny
2. I'm a good listener
3. I'm good at baking (is that good when you're trying to lose weight? Lol!!)
4. I'm loyal
5. I'm outspoken (I suppose this could be good or bad depending on whom you ask.)

Name 3 things you love like about your body: *****

1. My eyelashes
2. My ...

*****Okay I have to be honest. I literally stared at this part of my post for about 10 minutes just thinking... And thinking... And thinking... And I almost erased this section. I decided to keep it for those who are struggling like me. The point was to uplift myself because of all the negative self talk. I'm constantly criticizing and putting myself down. I wanted to show myself I have positive things to say...

Wow. I really showed myself I have a long way to go. It was almost impossible and unbearable to come up with the first 5. Then the second list was only 3 things I like about my appearance and I couldn't muster up anything. I'm not going to be where I want to be after a few days. These changes don't happen over night.This is a process. When I'm in a better place, a healthier place, I'm 100% positive I'll be able to list several things I love about me.

When I get to that place, I'll make a repost and update!*****